Positive Men: Shayne Evans

It’s Men’s Month! At KellyFairtheMentor.com we are highlighting positive male role models in the Chicago community…and you should meet them!

socialmention_shayne_evans_4553162Our first feature will be on Mr. Shayne Evans.  Mr. Evans is the CEO and Director of University of Chicago Charter Schools. “Through effective leadership, Evans works to strengthen the collaborations that exist among the four campuses and create new partnerships to leverage the expertise of teachers, leaders, counselors, social workers, tutors, and after-school providers.” This is apparent through his collaboration with Polished Pebbles. The Donoghue, NKO, and Woodlawn campuses host the Polished Pebbles mentoring program for their young ladies.

We had the pleasure of hearing from Mr. Evans on three important questions!

What lead you to start supporting Polished Pebbles?

From the beginning, Mr. Shayne Evans was a “huge believer in Kelly’s vision for young ladies.” Through conversations, he could tell that Kelly see the potential, power, and futures of these girls. Her vision matched his for his young ladies at UC Charter Schools. He was heavily impressed by Kelly’s connections to entrepreneurial and well-rounded people, who became her network of mentors and role models for his young ladies. He says that, “her optimism and positive approach helps her to overcome obstacles”. Due to all of this, Mr. Evans had no other option, but to bring Polished Pebbles to some of his campuses.

Thank you Mr. Evans for seeing Polished Pebble’s potential! Because we see the same in your young ladies at UC Charters!

What is one crisis you see young, African-American girls facing? How can we intervene?

Mr. Evans finds that “often society presents stereotypical views of young African-American ladies”. Because of this, their exists a “belief gap of what black and brown young ladies…are capable of”. This can be detrimental to the way we treat these young ladies in the school system. He sees the UC Charter Schools and Polished Pebbles Mentoring Program as positive interventions. They help to create “counter narratives” of young African-American ladies. Together, they “reestablish a vision” of these young ladies as “leaders, problem-solvers, innovators, engineers, and role models”.

His response reminds us of a previous article on KellyFairtheMentor.com. Click here to listen to Chimamanda Adichie speak about stereotypes and how they affect self-development.

What advice do you have for other male mentors?

His advice for male role models is to develop positive, professional relationships youth, especially young ladies. Mr. Evans believes this can be done by being both warm and demanding. You want to establish and maintain high expectations–“academically, behaviorally, socially”. These supportive relationships can truly help girls as they grow. He wants men to come together and work as a community to create positive opportunities for youth–“it is a joint effort”!

At KellyFairtheMentor.com and Polished Pebbles, we want to thank Mr. Shayne Evans for both taking the time to speak with us and for believing in our girls! Thank you for being such a positive male role model for young African American ladies, keep spreading your message!

Let’s Meet the Men

February marks Men’s Month! We want to take this time to recognize and celebrate the role responsible men play in our girl’s lives. Throughout history, there have been many black men that shaped our futures. Strong, black, men role models are essential to helping our girls build positive relationships with men.

Unfortunately, black fathers have been stereotyped as absent. Our family structure has constantly been called into question. Photographer Zun Lee eliminates these stereotypes in his touching photo series “Father Figure”. According to David Rosenberg’s article, “Lee said he is not only trying to shatter the stereotype of black men not being good fathers, but also the idea that black men are people to fear, something Lee said is obviously connected to racial profiling.”

“Basically, the statement I’m making is the reasons people assume black fathers are absent are the same reasons people assume black men are threatening,” Lee said. “People say [when looking at his work] ‘These are not the men I thought would be affectionate,’ and it confuses them to see these men with tattoos and muscles as being nonmenacing.”

Polished Pebble’s Men’s Month has similar goals. We want to encourage our girls, families, and black role models to celebrate the men in our lives! During this month, Kelly Fair the Mentor will be interviewing and sharing those interviews with you every Thursday. Don’t miss it!

A little peak at “Father Figure”….

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What You Can Learn From Cameka Smith

Last week we shared with you Cynthia Boykin of What U Need Is… Today we want everyone to know about Cameka Smith of BOSS Network.

screen-shot-2014-12-10-at-10-42-51-pmCameka Smith is the founder of BOSS Network, “Bringing Out Successful Sisters”. With a Master’s in Education, Cameka has dedicated herself to supporting the entrepreneurial spirit in women. As BOSS Network so succinctly and powerfully describes their founder, “Speaker, trainer, and award-winning entrepreneur…BOSS Network has evolved into a go-to resource for companies seeking female influencers as their target market. A one-stop-shop for career and entrepreneurial minded women”.

What Is She Proud Of?

Cameka Smith finds pride in her educational achievement. Coming from “an environment where most of my peers were looked at as a statistic”, her MA in Education helps her to work for change in her community! During her teaching career, she found enjoyment in working with at-risk youth. When her students follow their dreams she is able to see the impact she has had–their successes become her successes. This has been her constant reward. Her transition into BOSS Network only added to her positive influence in her community. Cameka is proud to be seen as an expert or industry influencer in her field.

Who Have Been Her Mentors, Her Motivators?

Cameka Smith sees the “every day women in her life”, her mother and aunts, as her greatest motivators. She came from a big, connected, and loving family that always maintained faith and commitment to one another and community. Seeing their commitment and love inspired her to maintain the same values. They have encouraged her to have a dedication to service and helping others. Cameka acknowledges her teachers, professors, and counselors who encouraged her to attain her Masters. Her education has truly helped her get to where she is today. The very women she works with through the BOSS Network are her mentors. They inspire her to keep working harder, to be creative.

Does She Think She’s A Mentor? …Because We Sure Do!

Cameka Smith first saw herself as a mentor when she began her career in education. She saw the need to provide positive role models for her students and other youth, so she acted! She began to create mentor programs for students. She wanted to showcase young professionals; let them “see what they can become” from “all walks of life”. She encourages youth, especially young girls, to join mentoring programs and to push their future visions. Cameka sees her entire career as building up youth into confident, successful young adults. We are thankful for Cameka and her work!

Now, What Does She Hope To See From Her Community?

Cameka reminds us all that “if you have lived on this earth, then you have something that you’ve been through…that you can share with another person”. So, do just that! She would like to see more community involvement in mentoring programs for youth (at Polished Pebbles, we agree!). Cameka sees women of color as essential contirbuters to their communities because they are natural role models and leaders. Cameka wants me to remind readers that for her, it was the “everyday women” who had the greatest impact on her. Which means there is nothing standing in your way!

People need hope, and sometimes we forget that hope exists within all of us. Mentors can be the spark that ignites the fire. Thank you Cameka for sharing this message with us!

Women on the Web: Interviews with Women Mentors You Should Know!

At KellyFairtheMentor.com, we had the opportunity to interview two beautiful, influential women–Cameka Smith of BOSS Network and Cynthia Boykin of What U Need Is… We are happy to share with you a combined presentation of their insights and inspirations for mentoring and strengthening community!

First, a little bio on our wonderful Women on the Web. Cameka Smith is the founder of BOSS Network. Screen Shot 2014-12-10 at 10.42.51 PMWith a Master’s in Education, Cameka has dedicated herself to supporting the entrepreneurial spirit in women. As BOSS Network so succinctly and powerfully describes their founder, “Speaker, trainer, and award-winning entrepreneur…BOSS Network has evolved into a go-to resource for companies seeking female influencers as their target market. A one-stop-shop for career and entrepreneurial minded women”. Screen Shot 2014-12-10 at 10.48.39 PM

Cynthia Boykin, “The Master Networker”, is the founder of What U Need Is…an essential connection between businesses and consumers in Chicago. As is said about the founder, “Cynthia is known for being able to build relationships connecting the right people together skillfully and swiftly.”

What Are They Proud Of?

Both of these women are proud of the paths their lives have taken…with some overlap! Cameka Smith finds pride in her educational achievement. Coming from “an environment where most of my peers were looked at as a statistic”, her MA in Education helps her to work for change in her community! When her students follow their dreams she is able to see the impact she has had on youth–their successes are her successes; a constant reward. Her transition into BOSS Network only added to her positive influence in her community. Speaking of BOSS Network, Cynthia Boykin is proud to be on the leadership board! Through this opportunity she was able to meet one of her mentors, Beverly Johnson (first black woman on the cover of Vogue). Following in her mentors footsteps, Cynthia was honored by being on the cover of Black Pages International Magazine in 2011 and 2012! She’s proud to be part of such a vibrant, successful community of women entrepreneurs and business owners.

Who Have Been Their Mentors, Their Motivators?

Cynthia Boykin cannot think of a positive influence on her life without remembering her mother. Cynthia says that she is a “woman who lead by example”. In 1952 she joined the Women’s Army Corps, pushing gender boundaries to find fulfillment in her life. Similarly, Cameka Smith sees the “every day women in her life”, her mother and aunts, as her greatest motivators. She came from a big, connected, and loving family that always maintained faith and commitment to one another and community. The very women she works with through the BOSS Network are her mentors. They keep her sharp and engaged as they eagerly strive to network and succeed. Both of these women have found that the women in their lives have been role models. They have shown Cynthia and Cameka positive, successful examples of women; whether that is mother and wife or business owner and entrepreneur. Cynthia gave a warmly appreciated shout out to Kelly Fair, citing her work with Polished Pebbles as one of the best young girls mentoring program in Chicago. Thank you Ms. Cynthia Boykin!

Polished Pebbles works to provide these examples of women to our girls. As we have learned from Cameka and Cynthia, this can positively influence their self-perception, and goal setting! When surrounded by such intelligent, strong women it is hard not to set such high goals!

Do They Think Their Mentors? …Because We Sure Do!

Cameka Smith first saw herself as a mentor when she began her career in education. She saw the need to provide positive role models for her students and other youth, so she acted! She began to create mentor programs for students. She wanted to showcase young professionals; let them “see what they can become” from “all walks of life”. Although she artfully evaded the question, we are here to tell her, Cameka Smith, you are a mentor! She encourages youth, especially young girls, to join mentoring programs to push their visions and extend their platforms. Giving another evasion, Cynthia Boykin described herself as a possible example for other women. We are also here to tell her, Cynthia Boykin, you are a mentor! She is a great resource connector and networker for her clients and community. She will use anything she has and can get to support those she can, utilizing a “I got mine, now let me help you get yours” mentality. She sees her sponsorship, encouragement, and support as an investment in great, upcoming people, businesses, and organizations–future change-makers! They both see their clients and peers as a reciprocal relationship; both teachers and learners, supporters and supported.

Now, What Do They Hope To See From Their Communities?

Both Cynthia Boykin and Cameka Smith want to see you, yes you readers, contributing to your communities! They can be through time, gifts, resources, or any other way of getting involved. Cameka reminds us all that “if you have lived on this earth, then you have something that you’ve been through…that you can share with another person”. So, do just that! She would like to see more community involvement in mentoring programs for youth (at Polished Pebbles, we agree!). Cameka sees women of color as essential contirbuters to their communities because they are natural role models and leaders. Thinking on an organizational level, Cynthia Boykin echoes the same goal, but for businesses! She wants to see more community center businesses that are dedicated to the growth of their communities. If they build reciprocal relationships, then businesses can connect more with their consumers!

We all need hope in our lives. Only by sharing our stories, experiences, advice, and wisdom with others can we encourage hope to grow!

Thank You, Cameka Smith And Cynthia Boykin!

These two women have been so supportive of Polished Pebbles and the work that we do with our girls, that we want to take the time to thank them for the work that they do! By creating their networks, they are able to connect mostly women of color with essential resources to grow their businesses and names. Without them, there would definitely be less sharing and caring here in Chicago. We hope you see the positve impact you have on individuals, organizations, and communities…because we do!

Readers, get to know these women entrepreneurs, these fellow Women on the Web!

Throwing Back to 2013, Pertesha Shares Her Story

This week we are throwing it back to 2013! A little reminiscing at the end of the year is the perfect way to remind us why we do what we do. Polished Pebbles has seen great growth in the last 5 years. We have now mentored over 1,000 girls and serve 30 sites in Chicago! To think we used to be small. During this exciting time it can be easy to get swept up in the numbers and forget about our individual impact. To each girl that goes through Polished Pebbles program, the experience is different. Although we have our mission of installing positive values, effective communication strategies, and confidence in our girls, they all take a different path. Each girl comes through our program with their own unique background and personality; making sure our work is never dull!

Now, let’s hear from a Polished Pebbles alum, Pertesha, as she shares her own Polished Pebbles story:

[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YyuHFSf0k4Y&w=560&h=315]

Thank you Pertesha!

Polished Pebbles has been working hard to ensure that all the girls that go through our program have such a positive experience. Here’s an infographic to let you know how we’ve been doing:

Updated Info.

Like what you’ve heard and read? Consider donating to Polished Pebbles to keep our program running strong, and our mission! With your help, small or large, Polished Pebbles will have a bright future! And together she will shine!

Click here to make your contribution! Remember, we aren’t just hoping for monetary support. If you have time, consider being a volunteer or mentor. Or, share your voice on our social media sites (including this one)!

How have you seen Polished Pebbles grow this year? What changes would you like to see in the next?

I Did Not Know That People Like Me Could Exist…

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Chimamanda Adichie is a rockin’ novelist from Nigeria. In her TedTalk, Chimamanda shares her personal story of growing up in Nigeria reading only stories about white children with blonde hair and blue eyes. When she began to write, these characters filled her pages; though she could not relate in any way. As the media around her, books, only portrayed white children in stories, she did not know that people who looked like her could be in literature!

From then on, Chimamanda became aware of these “single stories” we develop about people and places. When we only portray people or places in a single way, they become stereotypes. These stereotypes then dominate the identities we create about others and ourselves.

Although Chimamanda speaks to Africa, the same theories can be applied to the United States, most notably, African-Americans. From the historic beginnings of black face to the more recent token person of color, the portrayal of African-Americans by mainstream media has been poor. While we may naively assume that this is contained to only fictional movies and television shows, it is not. The news and social media have been prominent aggravators of the single story surrounding African-Americans. A recent example of this is the viral video of a New York man slapping a woman on the train after being insulted and hit (read more on my JET post here).

Having these stereotypes continually presented to our youth affect their self-development. As Chimamanda says, “The problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete”. Without the full story we cannot properly mentor and support our youth. Without analyzing communities, schools, and society we cannot begin to understand the family or the youth. We must search for the full story.

How do we do this as mentors, parents, teachers, friends, or community members? WE TALK TO OUR YOUTH! They can provide us their stories.

Do not fall for the danger of the single story.

How will you create an alternate ending?

Jumping to Celebrate Five Years of Mentoring Girls!

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If you’re in the Chicagoland area, get ready to jump & celebrate 5 years of Polished Pebbles! As many of you may know Polished Pebbles, is the girls mentoring program that I founded five years ago, and continue to direct and operate and we are starting to celebrate our 5th anniversary, and will do so at our first Saturday session. 

Polished Pebbles’ 1st Second Saturday’s Session of the year will be all about showing off your jump roping & double dutch skills!

Learn new moves from your friends & the talented ladies of Black Girls Jump at our kick-off event of the year!

When: Saturday, September 13th, 10 a.m.
Where: Chicago Urban League
(For girls ages 10-17)

A Role Model on a Mission

diane latikerKIDS OFF THE BLOCK SAVE A TEEN

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

By Tamara Meyerhoff, Polished Pebbles Intern

My mentoring responsibilities aren’t limited just to working with the school age -girls and female college students in Polished Pebbles.  I also find a tremendous about of satisfaction mentoring college/graduate interns as well.  I’m proud to share this blog post that was written by one of our summer interns Tamara Meyerhoff.  Tamara is a senior at St. Olaf College in Northfield, Minnesota. She is majoring in Social Work with a concentration in Family Studies. This summer she attended the Chicago Center for Urban Life and Culture in Hyde Park. Through her classes she was able to experience the culture of Chicago, from the South Side to the North Side. Tamara also completed two part-time internships–one with me at Polished Pebbles, and the other with United African Organization.

Last week I brought to your attention the effect of the school to prison pipeline on  black youth. The twitter conversation that followed brought up an important fact–mentoring alone is not the solution. As commenters have mentioned, there are systemic and institutional oppressions that are working against black youth, especially in the education system. It is intimidating to imagine tackling these large systems. We just have to remember that we make up the system, the government, the society. Changes starts with us. I strongly believe that everyday individuals are more than capable of inciting change. It takes energy, heart, and faith; but, it is possible. So, although small things, such as mentoring, may seem insignificant in the grand scheme, it is doing something. It is raising us out of our apathy.

Diane Latiker is a prime example of how a concerned resident, with an open heart, began to show the youth in her community the best of themselves. Kids Off the Block is located in one of Chicago’s underserved neighborhoods, Roseland. Diane works with the young men and women of Roseland to build a positive, safe, and creative environment for personal development. Kids Off the Block provides positive alternatives to youth to help them avoid the juvenile justice system. Similar to Polished Pebbles, she helps black youth see themselves in a new light. One that counters the harmful stereotypes. This self-esteem boosting mentoring style is not limited to organizations. It is something that all adults are capable of. Perhaps then, these children will move into another pipeline, the pipeline to careers. All children should grow up believing they have strength, endurance, confidence, and capability.

Celebrating Men!: President Obama’s My Brother’s Keeper Initiative

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As we close out “Men’s Month” for my girls mentoring program, Polished Pebbles, in Chicago, we thought it be nice to share an article about President Barack Obama’s “My Brother’s  Keeper,” an initiative to expand opportunity for young men and boys of color, He announced the launched of the initiative last week in the East Room of the White House, Feb. 27, 2014. To read the article click HERE.

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To view some pictures from our non-traditional Daddy Daughter Dance, with our mentoring community here in Chicago, click HERE.  Interested in organizing a similar initiative in your community?  Email me at [email protected].

Now that it’s March, and Women’s History Month, we are holding a Career Panel here in Chicago this Saturday, March 8th at 10 a.m. at the Chicago Urban League.  Panelists will include Congresswoman Robin Kelly, Alderwoman Pat Dowell, Alderwoman Leslie Hairston, Judge Sharon Oden, VP/General Manager Bloomingdale’s Carolyn Edwards.  Email us at [email protected] if you’d like to join us.

we can do it kelly rowland