What’s Love Got To Do With It?

Last week we shared with you amazing insights from L’Oreal Thompson Payton. In one of her ilovehumanityresponses, L’Oreal shares the definition of philanthropy as “love of humanity”. To close our April theme of Philanthropy and Giving, I want to delve into this definition. When we think about donating money, time, and resources, what does love got to do with it?

Valaida Fullwood, from Black and Brown News, proposes in her article, Love Of Humanity: Let’s Radically Engage In Reclaiming The Root Of Philanthropy, that philanthropy (and love) are inherent in Black America. She writes:

Indignities, inequities and injustices do not simply dissipate; instead, we must come together in systematically uprooting them – the needs are great and the need for unity greater.  The times beckon a new era of conscientious philanthropy, rooted in a love for community and expectations of social change. Let this generation, both young and old, embody a social transformation with bold recognition of our power and responsibility to give back.

Black America faces many challenges, not just in daily life but also from large institutions in this country. Fullwood suggests that by loving Black America, we can create sustainable change. An extension of that love is philanthropic giving. If we want to see change, we have to support that change! This radical redefining of philanthropy might change the way you think of giving. Philanthropy is not a single, begrudging act, it is an expression of self, a way of life. Instead of engaging in philanthropy. Be philanthropic. Be love. If philanthropy only takes love, then we all have a little to give.

Let’s reclaim the definition of philanthropy. Let’s love our humanity. Let’s love Black America.

You Should Know: L’Oreal Thompson Payton

unnamedWe want you to know L’Oreal Thompson Payton!

A Charm City girl in the Windy City, L’Oreal Thompson Payton is a professional storyteller with a penchant for people and a passion for purple. When she’s not busy writing, L’Oreal enjoys reading, dancing and devouring delicious cupcakes. Follow L’Oreal on FacebookTwitter or Instagram and visit her blog at LTintheCity.com.

How did you first get involved with Polished Pebbles?

I started volunteering with Polished Pebbles in January 2014. I had recently moved to Chicago and I desperately wanted to “give back” to the community. Helping young girls, especially young Black girls, has always been a passion of mine and I wanted to get involved with an organization that did just that. I came across Polished Pebbles in a Google search and, coincidentally, was later introduced to the founder, Kelly Fair, in my previous position as the Digital Content Editor for JET magazine. I recall attending the Second Saturday program that January (it was a Zumba class) and immediately falling in love with the program and the girls.

What is your role as a mentor for youth, primarily young, black girls, in your community?

As a mentor, my primary goal is to serve as a positive role model for young Black girls in the community. I’m always available to help and offer advice and really just be their biggest cheerleader. We all need someone in our corner cheering us on and shouting, “You can do it!” I believe in our girls and I want to be an example to them that anything is possible. I want them to see what I’ve accomplished and know that they can do it, too.

Who are the stand-out mentors in your life?

Wow, I have so many! First and foremost, my mom has constantly demonstrated what it means to be an upstanding daughter, wife, mother, business woman and woman of God. She is my rock.

Throughout my career, I’ve been fortunate to have several female editors who’ve taken me under their wings. Because of those editors, I’ve learned valuable life and career skills that I firmly believe have contributed to my overall success. I simply wouldn’t be here without the wonderful women (and loving men) in my life.

What ignited your passion for giving back to the community?

In middle school, I was constantly bullied for being smart (I skipped a grade), talking “White,” and for being ugly. There were nights when I prayed to God to make me White so I would be more beautiful. I literally hated the color of my skin and felt so unworthy. As an adult, I’ve realized I’m probably not the only girl who’s ever felt this way and it’s my personal mission to help young girls so hopefully they never have to feel that way.

How do you define philanthropy? How do you engage with it?

The Greek definition of philanthropy is “love of humanity.” For the most part, I think people typically equate philanthropy with rich people who donate a lot of money to a good cause. So I don’t consider myself a philanthropist in that sense of the word, but rather the original Greek version: I have a love of helping young girls.

There are plenty of ways to make a difference–whether it’s donating your time, money and/or talent; however, I do believe it’s important to “put your money where your mouth is,” which is why I contribute to Polished Pebbles on a regular basis. It’s an organization I truly believe in so I want to invest in our girls and help them succeed.

What is one barrier affecting young, black girls you have identified? Any solutions?

Nowadays, there are so many programs, such as My Brother’s Keeper, dedicated to helping young Black men, which is both awesome and necessary. But what about the girls? They live in the same neighborhoods as these young men, but it seems as though their needs and issues are often overlooked. I think programs like Polished Pebbles are part of the solution, but we can’t do it alone.

We need big companies to make an investment and show are girls they are valuable and worthy. For example, Google donated $190,000 to Black Girls Code last year…that’s a huge step in the right direction and other companies should follow in their footsteps. But the real work starts at home with positive role models in the community leading the way.

Do you have any final thoughts for us?

My hope is that every young Black girl will grow up knowing she is beautiful and worthy. I want each of them to feel empowered to accomplish their dreams and goals.

Money CAN Buy Happiness

Recently on Polished Pebbles, we have been sharing with you our Monthly Giving Program. It is an opportunity to support our Girls Mentoring Program by providing resources for our girls–journals, sweaters, transportation, and job shadowing experiences. We advertise that through this Giving Program you can support our young women for less than a cup of coffee a day! Now, this isn’t done to guilt any one of you (that’s the last thing we want our supporters to feel). We just want you to know that it doesn’t take big contributions to support us or our girls. Every cent counts and every cent can affect your happiness!

People who spent money on other people got happier. People who spent money on themselves, nothing happened. It didn’t make them less happy, it just didn’t do much for them. And the other thing we saw is the amount of money doesn’t matter that much. So people thought that 20 dollars would be way better than five dollars. In fact, it doesn’t matter how much money you spent. What really matters is that you spent it on somebody else rather than on yourself. (Michael Norton)

Take a listen to Michael Norton to learn more about the link between money and happiness.

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Women Making Herstory

Last week we shared with you black women who made herstory. Today, we want you to know women who are making herstory! These black women will inspire you to put your best foot forward. You could even raise your daughter to be like one of these heroins, these herstory-makers!

Women’s History Month: Herstory and Black Girls

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Following February’s Black History Month, is March’s Women’s History Month. The theme for 2015 is Weaving the Stories of Women’s Lives. The National Women’s History Project says the following on this year’s theme:

The stories of women’s lives, and the choices they made, encourage girls and young women to think larger and bolder, and give boys and men a fuller understanding of the female experience. Knowing women’s achievements challenges stereotypes and upends social assumptions about who women are and what women can accomplish today.

As “his”tory tends to leave out the presence and influence of women in the United States, there began a movement for “her”story. The goal is obvious, reverse the sexism and patriarchy that has plagued the telling of our past–weave in the stories of women’s lives. However, just as it is important to point out the sexism in the retelling of history, so to is highlighting the racism or colorblindness. Black men and women are also missing from history textbooks, their achievements and influence are either skipped over or played down compared to white men.

This is why it is important to remember that Black History Month and Women’s History Month are next to one another–the goal of the first should influence the second. Black women. They are often neglected in history and sometimes in herstory. While this may seem unimportant to some, it is essential to remember Edmund Burke: “Those who don’t remember history are destined to repeat it”.

In the present we are ignoring or forgetting black women and girls just as much as we do historically. Khadija Costley White wrote an article titled, “Racism affects black girls as much as boys. So why are girls being ignored?” She writes:

I am concerned about the fate of black and brown girls. Our stories are rarely told, and so people have learned to think they’re insignificant. Our experiences are minimized, and so, too, are our contributions.

This Women’s History Month let us not forget the black and brown women who have helped to shape and mold our country. Further, let us not forget how history affects the present and our futures. Let’s not write black girls out of our present stories just because they are not in the past.

#blackgirlsmatter

Positive Men: Don Krause

Mr. Don Krause is up next for our Men’s Month highlight! He has been a strong unnamedsupporter of both Polished Pebbles and Kelly Fair. He was more than happy to answer 3 important questions for us!

What lead you to start supporting Polished Pebbles?

Mr. Krause first met Kelly Fair at Bright Star Church. He was immediately impressed with her presence and dedication. Mr. Krause was equally impressed with Polished Pebbles and the professional young ladies that left the program. As “everybody needs life skills”, it made sense to him to support such an organization! The girls are learning how to “present [themselves] properly…communicate properly” and how to be competitive in their future endeavors.

Thank you Mr. Krause for the kind words!

What is one crisis you see young, African-American girls facing? How can we intervene?

He sees young girls “growing up in an area where they are exposed to violence…negative influences”. He thinks that because of this, it can be hard for these girls to “believe that their dreams can come true”. He sees the girls going through the Polished Pebbles Program as capable and bright! Mr. Krause believes that we can intervene by becoming more involved in the lives of youth. Although there are huge divisions in our society, we can come together to to donate resources and time to better the opportunities for our youth. He wants communities to realize that money is not always the necessary intervention. It takes proper administration for organizations to provide community supports. “You can be a positive influence to somebody”.

What advice do you have for other male mentors?

“Encouragement”! That is the advice Mr. Krause has for male mentors. We need to encourage our youth, especially young girls to reach their full potential. “You don’t know how little you do can mean so much. It’s the words of encouragement, it’s that smile, it’s giving someone a compliment, it’s giving someone your advice…letting them know they can get through it”. He wants male mentors to know that there are many rewards for the time, effort, and resources you donate to community.

You tell ’em Mr. Krause! Thank you for taking the time to be interviewed! And thank you for being such a positive male role model for young African American ladies, keep spreading your message!

Positive Men: Shayne Evans

It’s Men’s Month! At KellyFairtheMentor.com we are highlighting positive male role models in the Chicago community…and you should meet them!

socialmention_shayne_evans_4553162Our first feature will be on Mr. Shayne Evans.  Mr. Evans is the CEO and Director of University of Chicago Charter Schools. “Through effective leadership, Evans works to strengthen the collaborations that exist among the four campuses and create new partnerships to leverage the expertise of teachers, leaders, counselors, social workers, tutors, and after-school providers.” This is apparent through his collaboration with Polished Pebbles. The Donoghue, NKO, and Woodlawn campuses host the Polished Pebbles mentoring program for their young ladies.

We had the pleasure of hearing from Mr. Evans on three important questions!

What lead you to start supporting Polished Pebbles?

From the beginning, Mr. Shayne Evans was a “huge believer in Kelly’s vision for young ladies.” Through conversations, he could tell that Kelly see the potential, power, and futures of these girls. Her vision matched his for his young ladies at UC Charter Schools. He was heavily impressed by Kelly’s connections to entrepreneurial and well-rounded people, who became her network of mentors and role models for his young ladies. He says that, “her optimism and positive approach helps her to overcome obstacles”. Due to all of this, Mr. Evans had no other option, but to bring Polished Pebbles to some of his campuses.

Thank you Mr. Evans for seeing Polished Pebble’s potential! Because we see the same in your young ladies at UC Charters!

What is one crisis you see young, African-American girls facing? How can we intervene?

Mr. Evans finds that “often society presents stereotypical views of young African-American ladies”. Because of this, their exists a “belief gap of what black and brown young ladies…are capable of”. This can be detrimental to the way we treat these young ladies in the school system. He sees the UC Charter Schools and Polished Pebbles Mentoring Program as positive interventions. They help to create “counter narratives” of young African-American ladies. Together, they “reestablish a vision” of these young ladies as “leaders, problem-solvers, innovators, engineers, and role models”.

His response reminds us of a previous article on KellyFairtheMentor.com. Click here to listen to Chimamanda Adichie speak about stereotypes and how they affect self-development.

What advice do you have for other male mentors?

His advice for male role models is to develop positive, professional relationships youth, especially young ladies. Mr. Evans believes this can be done by being both warm and demanding. You want to establish and maintain high expectations–“academically, behaviorally, socially”. These supportive relationships can truly help girls as they grow. He wants men to come together and work as a community to create positive opportunities for youth–“it is a joint effort”!

At KellyFairtheMentor.com and Polished Pebbles, we want to thank Mr. Shayne Evans for both taking the time to speak with us and for believing in our girls! Thank you for being such a positive male role model for young African American ladies, keep spreading your message!

Let’s Meet the Men

February marks Men’s Month! We want to take this time to recognize and celebrate the role responsible men play in our girl’s lives. Throughout history, there have been many black men that shaped our futures. Strong, black, men role models are essential to helping our girls build positive relationships with men.

Unfortunately, black fathers have been stereotyped as absent. Our family structure has constantly been called into question. Photographer Zun Lee eliminates these stereotypes in his touching photo series “Father Figure”. According to David Rosenberg’s article, “Lee said he is not only trying to shatter the stereotype of black men not being good fathers, but also the idea that black men are people to fear, something Lee said is obviously connected to racial profiling.”

“Basically, the statement I’m making is the reasons people assume black fathers are absent are the same reasons people assume black men are threatening,” Lee said. “People say [when looking at his work] ‘These are not the men I thought would be affectionate,’ and it confuses them to see these men with tattoos and muscles as being nonmenacing.”

Polished Pebble’s Men’s Month has similar goals. We want to encourage our girls, families, and black role models to celebrate the men in our lives! During this month, Kelly Fair the Mentor will be interviewing and sharing those interviews with you every Thursday. Don’t miss it!

A little peak at “Father Figure”….

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What You Can Learn From Cameka Smith

Last week we shared with you Cynthia Boykin of What U Need Is… Today we want everyone to know about Cameka Smith of BOSS Network.

screen-shot-2014-12-10-at-10-42-51-pmCameka Smith is the founder of BOSS Network, “Bringing Out Successful Sisters”. With a Master’s in Education, Cameka has dedicated herself to supporting the entrepreneurial spirit in women. As BOSS Network so succinctly and powerfully describes their founder, “Speaker, trainer, and award-winning entrepreneur…BOSS Network has evolved into a go-to resource for companies seeking female influencers as their target market. A one-stop-shop for career and entrepreneurial minded women”.

What Is She Proud Of?

Cameka Smith finds pride in her educational achievement. Coming from “an environment where most of my peers were looked at as a statistic”, her MA in Education helps her to work for change in her community! During her teaching career, she found enjoyment in working with at-risk youth. When her students follow their dreams she is able to see the impact she has had–their successes become her successes. This has been her constant reward. Her transition into BOSS Network only added to her positive influence in her community. Cameka is proud to be seen as an expert or industry influencer in her field.

Who Have Been Her Mentors, Her Motivators?

Cameka Smith sees the “every day women in her life”, her mother and aunts, as her greatest motivators. She came from a big, connected, and loving family that always maintained faith and commitment to one another and community. Seeing their commitment and love inspired her to maintain the same values. They have encouraged her to have a dedication to service and helping others. Cameka acknowledges her teachers, professors, and counselors who encouraged her to attain her Masters. Her education has truly helped her get to where she is today. The very women she works with through the BOSS Network are her mentors. They inspire her to keep working harder, to be creative.

Does She Think She’s A Mentor? …Because We Sure Do!

Cameka Smith first saw herself as a mentor when she began her career in education. She saw the need to provide positive role models for her students and other youth, so she acted! She began to create mentor programs for students. She wanted to showcase young professionals; let them “see what they can become” from “all walks of life”. She encourages youth, especially young girls, to join mentoring programs and to push their future visions. Cameka sees her entire career as building up youth into confident, successful young adults. We are thankful for Cameka and her work!

Now, What Does She Hope To See From Her Community?

Cameka reminds us all that “if you have lived on this earth, then you have something that you’ve been through…that you can share with another person”. So, do just that! She would like to see more community involvement in mentoring programs for youth (at Polished Pebbles, we agree!). Cameka sees women of color as essential contirbuters to their communities because they are natural role models and leaders. Cameka wants me to remind readers that for her, it was the “everyday women” who had the greatest impact on her. Which means there is nothing standing in your way!

People need hope, and sometimes we forget that hope exists within all of us. Mentors can be the spark that ignites the fire. Thank you Cameka for sharing this message with us!

Happy New Year With Bright Futures Ahead!

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Happy New Year!

We hope everyone had a safe and fun New Year’s Eve to welcome in the exciting 2015! Thank you for all of those who have supported Polished Pebbles by donating to our girls. Your contributions will help fund activities, programs, transportation, and Polished Pebbles wear for the 2015 program year. For those still considering making a donation to Polished Pebbles, you can do so here online.

One of our partners, Microsoft, provides opportunities for technological experiences and education. Our girls give formal presentations to Microsoft staff and receive feedback. One of the Oakbrook Microsoft women we worked with, Megan Wright, even wrote an article on her partnership with Polished Pebbles! You can read it here.

As we look back on the year 2014 and the socio-political events that have affected African-American communities, it is important that we remember Polished Pebbles. Black girls are often forgotten as issues affecting them are not properly addressed compared to black boys. At Polished Pebbles, we are determined to be a positive intervention! We work against stereotypes to empower our girls to improve their situations and futures! Please join our partners, sponsors, volunteers, and mentors who have taken a stand with us by giving back! When you give, it benefits all!

If you missed last week’s post, check out our look back on our year with Polished Pebbles by clicking here.

Remember, with your help…TOGETHER SHE WILL SHINE!

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Hello bright and new 2015!

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